written by Mommy Marinda

I got up one morning and tried to feed Skiewie, but she refused to eat.  I did not worry too much as I though it was just her trying to be a big girl and eat by herself.  A while later I walked past her cage and noticed she was sleeping on her perch.  I thought she might be in a little pain and I gave her some pain medication. I lay her down on her teddy and covered her with a blanket as I thought she obviously needed some rest.

After 30 minutes of her lying there I thought something must be wrong as she never slept for that length of time during the day. I opened the blanket and she could hardly lift her little head up from the teddy bear.  I called out to my husband (who was also sick in bed at the time) that we had to get Skiewie to the vet immediately. I called the vet  to say we were on our way and he was waiting for us when we arrived.  Skiewie was taken from me and the tests on her began.  Once again I had to go home without my precious baby. She was very weak and her breathing was very shallow.  This was the most terrible time for me. Once again my baby was fighting for her life. As soon as I got home the vet phoned to tell me that she had very low blood counts and that her body was destroying her own blood.  He gave her an emergency blood transfusion to stabilize her and took X-rays which showed her liver to be enlarged.   The vet suspected that it was due to the bad infections she had suffered in the past 6 weeks.  He said he wanted to take her home with him to monitor her during the night. I hardly slept that night thinking of her making little noises in her cage and the next morning I went to see her and took her her favourite teddy bear so she would not feel too lonely and disorientated.  I was able to spend quite some time with her and she was happy to see me.  I could tell she was in a lot of pain. The vet took me to the X-Ray department and showed me her X-Rays.  I knew that we would need to be strong for this part of our journey.
The next day the vet called to update us. He said she was looking better and that she might be able to come home soon.  She would be given liver medication and would have to have a special diet.
Four hours later the vet called again to say that our little one had taken a turn for the worse and I needed to get there as soon as possible.  As I arrived at the Vet the receptionist I had become so dependent upon was there to greet us.  I could see by the look in her eyes that things were not good at all.  I was told that there was nothing further they could do for her and that there was no hope left for her recovery.  They took me to see her and she perked up a bit making making noises and kissing me. I held her against my chest and was told that she was slowly dying as her organs were shutting down. I was told that the best and the most loving thing I could do for her was to allow her to be euthanased as she would die a painful death within the next couple of days if left. I held her to my chest taking the worst decision of my life. The doctors left me to spend time with her and then came in.  I wanted to stay with her right until the end and I held her close and told her how much I loved her until I could feel there was no more life in her little body.

She lay on my chest and my tears rolled down onto her wings as they had done so in the past 7 weeks that she had been in my life.

The road trip home from the vets was the worst one. I clung onto her teddys as sif I was clinging onto her.  I asked for her to be cremated .   An empty cage filled with her toys was what greeted me when I got home.
The next day I went to buy a rose bush which I planted in her memory (she was my beautiful flower child).  I selected a white rose bush as it sysmbolised all the hurdles she had faced.  She climbed her iceberg and was now flying high above the white clouds in heaven.

I collected her ashes and now she is home again where she belongs.
I will forever remember her sweet little smile and one day I will see it again and I will be able to play with her again in the gardens of heaven chasing all the dinosaurs.

Rest in peace little one.  I will miss you till the day we are together again .  I see your beautiful little smile in my dream and I know you are with me .  I love you lots and lots and miss you terribly.

Your mommy . Marinda xxxxx

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